Right, what happened?
One day I had 2 children lets call them DD and DS. If I ever went anywhere and came back they would literally run to the front door or if unable to would shout "Mummy!" in the most excited voices ever eagerly awaiting a hug and kiss from me. However this appears to have been lost in the dim past as discovered yesterday when I came back from the gym and DD didn't even notice that I had gone and DS (13) welcomed me with a lovely grunt. No warm welcome for me.
I spent some time at a friends yesterday afternoon (any escape from my house at the moment - half term) only to find out that DD has plenty of homework to do over the holidays and am pretty sure that she told me she had none. Popped home to find DD very studious working her way through her GCSE English. (I know, I know what does she want? More of that later)
"I have to critique Miss Havisham" she says; Wow I say, I did that, I love her. In fact Helena Bonham Carter is playing her in the film which is out later this month, shall we go and see it together? I ask. "This is why I didn't tell you about my homework because you get too cosy, I'm fine thanks" she turns away and carries on. Queue me to leave the bedroom.
Wow. That really hurt. I stood there for a second but felt like 10 minutes really shocked. Why doesn't she want my help? Why can't I sit with her and chat like we used to?
Took me a lot of courage to walk out the door without saying anything - if you knew me you'd know that I usually would not let that go without giving at least a 15 minute lecture (borefest) on 'I'm only asking as I care/am worried/want to help'. But I have to let you in on a secret, I have had a little help with this. I have finally been reading the book recommended on Mumsnet regarding teenagers and their behaviour and it is slowly falling in to place. I know that teens brains work very differently and that there is a big struggle within themselves but how they behave and why is so wonderfully explained that it makes things, almost, ok.
Well, I neglected to say that one reason DD is doing homework apart from because she has so much to do is the fact that her and 11 other girls are off to a Halloween party in the City. We are cutting the apron strings as mums and allowing them to go by minibus 20 miles down the road to an organised U18's disco. They are then all staying at one girls house - Queue the panic now. Will the bus driver get them there safely? Are there seatbelts on the bus? Will they all get in? Have they remembered their tickets? Will they stay together? Will they all catch bus back? What happens if they get ill in the night? Will any of them drink? What if they meet boys? and on and on and on
Now I realise that in the cold light of day this is hilarious, bordering on pathetic. They are all 14/15 and as parents we have all angles covered e.g. minibus hired from reputable company; party all checked out; and also we do have to give them some credit as they lurch down the slope from being children to adults. They have to learn to look after themselves but the worry never stops does it?
I have to admit I gave in and did text DD to check she was alright and had no reply until they were back at friends house "sorry" she wrote, "left my phone back at (friends) house so only just got your text we are all back and having pizza". Ah, so now I can sleep without worrying.
So now it seems that I am the one eagerly anticipating their return - case of role reversal....